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Keep a smile on your face, and the dogshit off your shoes...confused? Read below...
OK...All those who know me, know that I am working for a pet sitting company in South Arlington, Happy Hounds..(703-553-0555).
Also...I am an actor in DC...therefore, I am CONSTANTLY fighting for money.
Now that I am not performing in a show till November, I have to make as much money as I can, anyway I can....hey big boy, how ya' doin? Sorry. No. Not that way. Yet.
So, I have taken on some pet-sitting jobs, where I go and stay at people's houses and take care of their pets for money. The way I see it, I'm paid to sleep somewhere...no brainer.
That was, until I met Molly.
Molly, a Chocolate Lab puppy of 4 months is cute, sure. Behind that cuteness lay the eyes of Satan.
I started my stay with Molly on this past Thursday night. She didn't go to bed till 3AM. I was in hell. I played with her all that I possibly could, but it was not enough. When I stopped playing and shut my eyes, she would bark at me. Finally, she fell asleep at 3. She woke me up promptly at 5:30 AM. She ran to the door and back to me, indicating a need for potty time. I said, "Screw you, you just let me go to sleep 2 hours ago, you can wait!" I closed my eyes. I suddenly feel a warm sensation on my feet. I jumped up and saw a huge turd on my feet. Serves me right, I guess. Molly and I were arch enemies ever since.
Oh, yes, my friends...Like Batman and The Joker, such are me and Molly. In the course of my 3 day tour, she ate everything. For all my close personal friends, you know my beer tab necklace. My personal talisman. She ate it. I could have killed her. She chewed my phone till it looks like it went into an acid bath. A DVD of mine, as well. "The Pigkeeper's Daughter", if you were curious.
I ended my sentence Sunday afternoon and returned to the solace of my home, Matthew and Buddha the wonder pug. I slept like a babe, a little richer, even.
Then I get a call tonight from my boss. Molly needs an overnight next Saturday night. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Will I do it? Sure....$.
Will I take a rubber mallet? Perhaps...:)